Eminem beat Kim until she was black and blue repeatedly and he’s one of the best rappers alive, Chris Brown beat Rihanna and he’s the worst person on the face of this earth.
So let’s talk about abuse and domestic violence! Eminem and Rihanna collaborated on a new song, Love The Way You Lie, talking about the sick cycle of domestic violence. A year and half after the Chris Brown and Rihanna assault, we’re back on this topic. Love The Way You Lie has the potential to be one of the biggest hits this year, which means physical abuse and emotional abuse will be on a lot of our minds.
Now you’re in each other’s face spewin’ venom in your words when you spit em |You push pull each other’s hair | Scratch claw hit em throw em down pin em | So lost in the moments when you’re in em | It’s the face that’s the culprit, controls you both | So they say it’s best to go your seperate ways | Guess that they don’t know ya | Cause today that was yesterday | Yesterday is over, it’s a different day
[Photo Credit: Rap Radar]
At first, I thought this was an attempt to get back at Chris Brown and make money while doing so, or in other words a way to market the situation for publicity. But that was not the case. I love this song, and I hate this song. I love this song because Eminem is open about his role and the part he played in an abusive relationship with Kim, who he beat until she was black and blue repeatedly, and even sent her to the hospital. I hate this song because Eminem is a serial abuser, and he has never suffered the backlash from his abuse, and if this song is a hit, he will also make money from it. I appreciate him for putting his heart on his sleeves, and opening up his mind to this sick cycle, but it also reminds me how fair the media can be when the victims has NO NAME (celebrity status).
I also hate this song because Rihanna describes the lyrics as, “so deep, so beautiful and intense. It’s something that I understood, something I connected with.” It was nothing beautiful about that night back in February of 2009, and it’s nothing beautiful about that type of violence. Secondly, this song is just from the perspective of the abuser, and in a recent interview regarding the song, Rihanna only admits to being a victim of physical (on the other side of it). Yes she was a victim of abuse, but she wasn’t “just” a victim. Let’s be honest, Chris Brown was the only one that got caught. I don’t won’t to marginalize Rihanna’s experience because I know abuse hurts and it stays with you, but in her own words Rihanna admits to slapping Chris Brown (not that particular night but times before). Like Rihanna said in a past interview, the bruises will heal, it’s what the abuse does to you mentally and emotionally that doesn’t go away. So a slap from a woman may not break a man on the outside, but it certainly can leave a scar on the inside.
Domestic violence is not a one situation fits all, some people are sadistic and controlling (Mel Gibson), and others model abusive patterns from relationships they’ve observed, and some just never learned the proper way to cope or deal with anger.
@iambellingtoon
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 9:54 AM
Mrs.Grapevine i love you, it’s always makes me laugh when I hear ppl talk about the Chris brown case and how media threw him to the dogs. Weeks before that night in the car every blog was calling rihanna crazy and controlling and abusive to Chris brown and no one offered or repeated that information from that night in the car. Violence is something that doesn’t sit right from me from either side as woman I don’t want to be touched and as a sister to two brothers i want no one to touch and tempt them. I guess if you’re a rapper your hard and its expected esp. if the woman isn’t a celebrity… enter fat Joe’s wife, em’s wife rather than a world entertainer like rihanna.
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MrsGrapevine Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 8:37 PM
@@iambellingtoon,
I think the message should be clear, no violence at all.
I’m not saying Rihanna deserved anything, but the coverage hasn’t been fair or balanced.
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BluntRemarks
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 10:09 AM
I think it’s sad that she can talk about it sing about it and in ways glorify it and not be looked down on or critizied. If Chris Brown were to do a song on his own or with anyone else he would have to scrape his career off the bottom of the ocean again. One day Rhianna will realize that what is done in the dark always come to light and her ugly abusive side will be revealed.
[Reply to this comment]
MrsGrapevine Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 8:40 PM
@BluntRemarks,
She wouldn’t suffer a backlash because she’s a woman. At this point it’s all just water under the bridge.
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Tweets that mention Eminem & Rihanna New Song Aimed At Chris Brown? | MrsGrapevine.com -- Topsy.com
Pingback made on 07/28/2010 @ 10:12 AM
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by MrsGrapevine dot Com, MrsGrapevine dot Com. MrsGrapevine dot Com said: @MrsGrapevine OMG! The Lyrics To Eminem & Rihanna’s New Song: Love The Way You Lie: So let’s talk … http://bit.ly/bgvflG MrsGrapevine.com [...]
Bliss
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 12:53 PM
Wow…first of all If pix of Kim were public eminem would gave backlash. Chris brown is hated because everyone saw those pictures and what he is capable of. He also failed pr wise by doing a million pointless interviews and looking like he felt sorry for himself not what he did. Also I don’t get this trash women spew about Rihanna slapping chris…if she did she didn’t deserve to be beaten so badly second Chris brown turned himself in and there were no reports of any injuries to his face or body so stop tryna excuse his behavior by pretending you know Rihanna hit him or was controlling or whatever. Regrdless if Chris had better pr he would be back on top as well
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MrsGrapevine 2 Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 5:36 PM
@Bliss,
“I don’t get this trash women spew about Rihanna slapping chris…”
Because in her statement to the police, she said that she’s slapped him before, prior to that night.
Secondly, no one is saying that slapping him is the cause of the fight or the reason he hit her. But it is evidence that they were abusive toward each other, so it sounds like a cycle that got out of control.
The point is not to defend Chris Brown, but it’s also not to ridicule him.
Lastly, Chris Brown could have gotten out that car and walked away. That’s why I clearly said there was nothing beautiful about that night. It was horrible, and it was all Chris’s fault.
However, there were signs they both could have avoided before it even got to that point. That’s what we need to be talking about. How to stop the violence.
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Bliss Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 9:48 PM
@MrsGrapevine 2, Understood…Both could have done things to prevent the drastic nature of that night. But I just have no sympathy for Chris because of the way he has carried himself after the interviews from the interviews to the music he decided to put out to the women and tattoos to the exaggerated self indulgent Mike Jackson tribute…etc. He just rubs me the wrong way. I am all about redemption but coming from an abusive house myself I just haven’t seen and signs of acknowledgment or will to really address his problem. Chris just wants his fame back and is mad he can’t have it.
[Reply to this comment]
dianne
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 2:08 PM
JEALOUS IS AS CRUEL AS THE GRAVE AND JUST AS DEADLY. Most people have heard that. MOST people know that caribbean blacks R JEALOUS of black americans(especially us women) and will do anything to kill, steal and destroy us. For example, LisaRaye. The same caribbean women who wished death on chris, applauded misick for beating HIS WIFE Lisaraye and stealing everything she brought into the marriage. They applaud EVERY CARIBBEAN who works to destroy a black american. It is called ethnic hatred. CARIBBEANS WANT DESPERATELY TO BOND WITH WHITE RASCIST TO DESTROY BLACK AMERICANS AND STEAL MLK’S DREAM FOR THEMSELF. THEY OFTEN DO IT IN CORPORATE AMERICA, AND NOW THEY’RE DOING IT IN THE ENTERTAINMENT COMMUNITY. AS LONG AS BLACK AMERICA REMAINS GULLIBLE AND TRY TO BOND WITH BLACK HATERS THEY WILL SUCCEED.
THIS WAS TO BE CHRIS’S BIGEST YEAR. JET MAG PREDICTED THAT. NOW THE CARIBBEAN CREEP HAS STOLE IT FOR HERSELF. SHE PICKED THAT FIGHT AND PROVOKED HIM TO DO JUST THAT.
BLACK AMERICA NEEDS TO STAY AWAY FROM FOREIGN BLACK HATERS WHO ONLY COME TO AMERICA TO KILL, STEAL AND DESTROY. THEY DIDNT WANT TO COME HERE WHEN WE WERE IN THE COTTON FIELDS. NOW THAT WE WON SOME OPPORTUNITIES THEY COME TO STEAL OUR CHILDREN’S BIRTHRIGHT TO INHERIT FROM OUR CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT. VOUDON RELIGION IS EVIL, AND THEY ALL PRACTICE IT IN SECRET.
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C. Johnson Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 7:22 PM
@dianne, you have issues. I think you need to seek help!!!!
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C. Johnson Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 7:25 PM
@dianne, let me put it in caps like u did. YOU HAVE ISSUES. I THINK YOU NEED TO SEEK HELP!!!! THEY HAVE MEDICATION FOR THAT. oh when i say “they” i don’t mean Caribbean people i mean doctors. So its ok to seek help.
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STEFANY
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 3:44 PM
If Rihanna did in fact hit Chris first he should have pulled the car over and put her @ss out as oppose too beating the s**t out of her. A man will always be judged more harshly in a domestic situation no matter what the circumstances are. I don’t believe that was the first time Rihanna and Chris have faught each other it just got out hand that time. I feel that Rihanna has benefited more publically from the sitution as oppose to behaving like a true victim.
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MrsGrapevine Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 8:46 PM
@STEFANY,
Agrees. He should have pulled the car over, and I bet he knows that now.
I don’t know why she chose to do this song, but describing the words as beautiful doesn’t sit well with me, and inviting the abuse in the lyrics just sends mix messages.
Lastly, saying that she’s doing it because it sounded like a hit also gets to me.
The thing with celebs is that you don’t know what’s genuine and what’s publicity.
[Reply to this comment]
Kimora Cochran
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 7:14 PM
When Rihanna sings “just gonna stand there and watch me burn But that’s alright because I like the way it hurts” it could send the wrong message to her young impressionable fans. It could possibly lead them to believe that domestic violence is okay, and may even be enjoyable. The song has been on the top of the charts lately, and I have to admit the I enjoy singing along when it comes on the radio. But when I read this it did make me question the message both parties are sending, in the name of making a hit.
[Reply to this comment]
MrsGrapevine Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 8:50 PM
@Kimora Cochran,
It’s sick and disturbing, because it doesn’t take a strong enough stance. It’s almost flirting with pain and it’s like a sadistic romance. I get that’s how the cycle can be, but it’s glamorized more than it is marred.
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I Am Your People
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 7:35 PM
What’s the reason Chris Brown is singled out? No one asks Sean Penn about serially beating then-wife Madonna, and they were also two big celebrities at the time. My 2 cs
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west indian culture is pure EVIL
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 7:48 PM
@c.johnson
To tell the honest truth, I personally would never be with a Jamaican man…. Most of them who come here from Jamaica are looking for someone to use and take advantage if not infect them with HIV/AIDS. My girlfriend was with someone who is Jamaican, and he messed her over BAD. He messed up her credit by getting her involved in a scam (She didn’t know it was a scam til it was too late). He always acted like he was mad at the world. I REPEAT, I am not saying ALL Jamaican men are like this, but MOST of them are.
I am not even going to lie—I won’t mess with a west indian man to save my life and I am west indian! I have had to deal with (on top of everyday relationship problems) being drug in the middle of scams and also physical abuse. The last straw was when my last boyfriend was behind my back getting stolen items sent to my house. The police came to my door and he was sitting right on the couch and denied everything even though they said they would put ME in jail!
I also think I had one boyfriend who tried to use witchcraft on me because of some strange stuff I found out about.
I ONLY deal with African American men now and things have been going MUCH better
>>It’s true… I know a lot of jamaican men (Not all, but most of them) are AIDS infested… I remember before I got saved for real, I was messing with this Jamaican guy who moved here to NY from Jamaica just about a year or two before, and once, when we were intimate… he rolled over and told me, “I have AIDS”….. Then I just looked at him with TOTAL shock on my face…. and he waited about close to what seemed like forever and told me he was just joking…. But I don’t think he was…. I have been tested several times before AND after then, and the tests come up negative. >>
I had one boyfriend who I found out was doing God Knows what back in Jamaica. I told him I wanted to use condoms and he had the nerve to slap the crap out of me. He slapped me so hard that blood came out of my nose. The only way he left my house is because I grabbed the phone and pressed 911. He jumped up and left.
I’ve also have had my feel of being involved in scams by the men I was dealing with. I myself never do anything to break the law, but the men I was involved with was deep in the crap and when the police came into the picture I was left out to dry and I was innocent.
I have been dealing with African American Christian men and I have had MUCH better luck in my life.
I think it has a lot to do with the poverty and lifestyle. Almost everyone wants what the people in America has in terms of wealth. They might not want to say it but they do. To be honest it’s not just the men who are not worth much either. I have female family and old friends that I do not even talk to because they are always on a scam or worse.Some of the women can be just as underhanded because of the men. But back to the men, I think what women in the US don’t understand is the west indian mindset. MOST (not all) are terrible liars and cheaters. The violence is another thing too. I always tell the few American friends I have made here to NOT get involved with a man fresh from the Islands. You are playing with fire.
One of my co-workers was dating a man from my homeland–Jamaica—and she told me she thought he was cheating. I told her to just pay attention and if she catches him in lies, then he probably is cheating. so the next week after she told me this, she comes to work with stitches in her forehead. She privately told me that she followed him and caught him going to another woman’s house and when she approached him as he walked to the doorway, he punched he to the ground. Sorry to say but he was illegal so calling the police would do no good.
I hate to say it, but I distance myself from a lot of people from where I came from. They seem to always have stealing and wickedness in their minds.
[Reply to this comment]
MrsGrapevine Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 8:31 PM
@west indian culture is pure EVIL,
You’re the only one spreading evil and calling evil spirits by name. That I can’t allow. Any mention of names of spirits will get deleted. I will however pray for you because you do not fool me.
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C. Johnson Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 2:24 AM
@west indian culture is pure EVIL,
I see you haven’t seeked help yet.
Listening to you about your past relationships. Maybe you should think after it’s a reocurring thing with different men, that it maybe you picking bad ones. I asked if you were ignorant or stupid, I’ll let you choose one.
But I think you summed it up for me in your comments. In the begining of your rambiling you pointed out you are West Indian. Then at the end of your rambiling you said
“the US don’t understand is the west indian mindset. MOST (not all) are terrible liars and cheaters. The violence is another thing too…..You are playing with fire”. I see now you were talking about yourself too. I guess you would no first hand day to day, 24/7, 365.
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what does this have to do with chris brown u say?
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 8:22 PM
if u have a brain grapevine u would understand how the below correlates to what happened to chris brown and every other black american who allows an american hater into their life. however i suspect that U R nothing but a low life caribbean coon hoping to feed on and vent your hate by owning a blog like that dirt bag sandra rose, and so many other LOSERS.
Guyanese man surrenders in Trinidad
A terror plot that could have killed millions of Americans is stopped by authorities. So far, 3 people have been arrested and authorities are looking for a 4th in this alleged terror plot on the JFK Airport in New York City. Reports show that the plot was to blow up jet fuel pipelines and tanks at JFK to create a massive explosion. One pipeline stretches nearly 40 miles from Linden, New Jersey to the airport and goes through residential neighborhoods. Authorities say one of the suspects, a U.S. citizen and a native of Guyana, once worked at the airport
The case was broken open by an informant — a twice-convicted drug dealer who found himself in the midst of what investigators called a terrorist plot conceived as more devastating than the Sept. 11 attacks.
“Would you like to die as a martyr?” the informant was asked, according to the indictment.
He unhesitatingly replied yes and soon was making surveillance trips around the airport — the “chicken farm,” as the planners dubbed their target.
Authorities said the JFK scheme was an example of homegrown terrorism. Defreitas, 63, immigrated to the U.S. more than 30 years ago, but he told the federal informant that his feelings of disgust toward his adopted homeland had lingered for years
Terror Plot Takedown
one a legal immigrant from Haiti and one an illegal Haitian immigrant. Federal prosecutors say the men were members of a “homegrown” terrorist cell that had pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda and was plotting deadly, 9/11-scale attacks.
The government charges they intended to blow up the FBI’s Miami headquarters and bring down the Sears Tower in Chicago.
Terror Plot Takedown
one a legal immigrant from Haiti and one an illegal Haitian immigrant. Federal prosecutors say the men were members of a “homegrown” terrorist cell that had pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda and was plotting deadly, 9/11-scale attacks.
The government charges they intended to blow up the FBI’s Miami headquarters and bring down the Sears Tower in Chicago.
[Reply to this comment]
MrsGrapevine Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 8:29 PM
@what does this have to do with chris brown u say?,
Beloved, do not believe every spirit but test the spirits, whether they are God because many false prophets have gone out into the world.
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MrsGrapevine
Comment made on 07/28/2010 @ 8:23 PM
I rebuke you, I don’t know your name, but I rebuke you.
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@iambellington Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 10:05 AM
@MrsGrapevine, I use that phrase everyday. But I think this conversation and comments have taken another course. I will not speak about things I know nothing of such as spirits and evil, voodoo and so on. I think regardless when it comes to violence you have to get the cause and effect. You can’t just stop a man from hitting an abusive woman by putting him in jail and licking the woman’s wounds. They both have to be held equally responsible so that the fear is equal. From there we can grow. As strong independent women we have to make our daughters as well as our sons responsible. That was all I really was attempting to say. I don’t know Chris Brown I don’t know Rihanna and NO ONE knows what happened in that car. I commend Chris Brown for manning up and accepting all the blame. That’s what he really did by not commenting on the issue. He let the world see it how Rihanna wanted and he took all the blame, took a guilty plea and said no comment. Because it could have been a He said she said.
[Reply to this comment]
MrsGrapevine 2 Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 10:19 AM
@@iambellington,
You are fine, and I agree with your comments. There is one person who likes to post crazy things, so that message was for her.
I think education on violence needs to be comprehensive, too. As a society I don’t think it’s okay to say that women can do anything to a man short of killing him, and it’s overlooked.
I think it’s best we teach a message that violence hurts [PERIOD].
I think if we understand the cycle, we can do more to break the cycle.
[Reply to this comment]
@iambellington Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 10:35 AM
@MrsGrapevine 2, Very true. It’s like when I was watching Teen Mom. There is a couple on there that the girl hits this guy every other episode. But the one time he pushed her MTV has a PSA saying Violence isn’t okay. It made me really think, are they telling teens that violence and domestic abuse only occurs when a man lays his hands on you? A young lady on twitter told a story about her friend who camped out at her bfs house and when she saw him come home she proceeded to get out and beat him with a tire iron. When the police came they tried to arrest him because he had her up against a car to stop her from hitting him. Tire iron still in her hand.
resurrected
Comment made on 07/29/2010 @ 5:15 AM
From what I hear Rhianna and Chris were both raised in abusive household so there reality is probably different from people who were raise in a healthier household. This is why I did by Rhianna abuse story she saw her mother get her azz kicked all the time and well as Chris so there reality maybe be to fight over everything. I hear Rhianna mother suffer way more abuse this Chris’s mother but still the same children mimic what they see not what they hear. She seems very violent to me or at least has the feel.
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M$. Ho!!@nd
Comment made on 07/29/2010 @ 5:41 AM
I was listening to the lyrics of this song this morning and I was thinking how in the world Rihanna sitting there singing about that! Money talks!
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dianne
Comment made on 07/29/2010 @ 2:20 PM
@c.johnson
either u r a complete fool OR a caribbean coon satan worshipper desperate to keep evil on the down low. which one r u?
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Kamkam
Comment made on 07/29/2010 @ 3:04 PM
My dad is west indian and my mom is american believe there is no difference between where you are born and what race you are. Violence is violence all ppls do witchcraft and all ppls commit illegal crimes and before 9/11 ppl were committing crimes against america where were you?? Not paying attention. These things happen due to personal choice you got beat up by him or her by personal choice. It takes 6th time of getting beat before a person leaves the situation. How many times did it take for you?? I’m just so hurt that ppl are being prejudice on here we need to come together and not stand apart. I mean that west indian talk was disgusting and saying americans are that gullible the same. Its all personal choice what do you choose.
[Reply to this comment]
C. Johnson Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 5:45 PM
@Kamkam,
you are right! It’s the same person going under different names trying to get their point of view across which is just making him or herself look like the racist.
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MrsGrapevine 2
Comment made on 07/29/2010 @ 3:57 PM
@r u calling the bible a lie,
Funny, I don’t see Haitian, Carribbean, West Indian, or “Foreign Black” anyone in that passage.
You seem to no more about the devil than about God, which is disturbing.
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C. Johnson
Comment made on 07/29/2010 @ 4:22 PM
@r u calling the bible a lie, I think MrsGrapevine summed it up. Nuff said!
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